When I was young and without a driver’s license, Lauren’s mom would sometimes carpool me to my house from classes. We would talk about all kinds of things–classes, memories, God. Probably colleges, too. Being in high school has its own set of stressors.
One day Lauren’s mom started talking about her wedding. Maybe we were reading about a wedding in one of our assigned great classic literature pieces or something…who knows? I remember we asked Lauren’s mom all of the typical questions. I think she won her dress at a bridal expo. I can’t remember about the flowers. I can’t remember about the first dance.
I do remember her saying she was surprised when she walked down the aisle.
And we asked her why and she said that it was the first time in her life when she went to an event surrounded by people she knew. She said she looked at their faces and thought, “Oh, hi! And hi to you, too! And you, too! It is so good to see you all here!”
She shared that of course she had invited people and had received their RSVP’s and all…but it wasn’t until she saw them all gathered that the full weight of the love of the celebration came to full realization. 🙂
I called Lauren a few nights ago. She lives a few states over, now. She’s still, in some aspects, one of my closest friends; over the phone that evening we shared a little and prayed a lot. I’m not sure when I’ll see her next, so until then, this is what I will rely on.
Speaking about prayer-partners, mine is states away, too. She and I text through all of the hard, hard things. I mean, that’s what prayer partners are for, right? The hard things. I’m not sure when I’ll see her next. And so, until then, late-night texts are the way we will live.
I called my boyfrand a few nights ago. He lives states away, too. I see him sometimes, but mostly we just talk long-distance over the phone. I’m not sure when I’ll see him again. There has been a little discussion but no plane tickets purchased for when we’ll meet again.
I texted Father Ryan a few nights ago, when things were getting scary-serious and stuff was hitting the fan. He’s the kind of person who says things like, “Please, keep breathing,” which is a really important kind of friend to have. I don’t know when I’ll see him again. He has no reason to come to Detroit; I have no pressing reason to visit Denver. And so, I treasure his challenging and comforting texts both and reread them sometimes. It’s all I have.
The next morning my cousin, now a few states over, texted me about new opportunities for her, new joy. I don’t know when I’ll see her again, hike with her again, craft with her again. I hope it is soon. But, I don’t know.
In an age of technology, these connections are still manageable. I value them very much.
Only, sometimes, I wish they were all here.
I wish that Lauren and her sister knew my prayer partner, Lisa. Because they all love Jesus and music and are stunning, gracious, beautiful, strong women.
I wish my boyfrand knew Father Ryan, because both are important to me…very important. Only, we all live states apart.
I wish my friends could watch Father Ryan mimic the legendary Father Abraham, patriarch of the faith.
I wish my cousin would join me for crafts and hiking again.
Only, they won’t. They can’t. Just as I have friends and family and community and a job, so do they. There is no relocation.
But…but. But what if we could?
This, my friend, is what an extrovert-heart reads like: “Do you want to know what would be fun?? If all of my people were in the same spot. And, also, music. And, also, dancing. That. That would be fun.”
A lot of scripture is filled with poetic language describing truths that we are too simple to understand. And, so, believers are like seeds scattered or like little chicks to be gathered under a hen’s wing. And heaven, they say, is like a wedding feast.
Yo, introverts? What is your heaven like? Is it near the restful waters? I don’t know.
But I do know that I came home today and a letter from Father Ryan was addressed to me, and I opened it and loved it and him a little more. Yo, I probably won’t see him for a while. I probably see all of my people for a while.
But, until then, I can just aim for heaven and that divine wedding feast of party, music, and all my people.